drunk and disorderly

australia day was a little bit exciting, i still have the fake tatoos to prove it.

New house

My new house (pics shortly to follow) has so much outdoor space that I have finally entered a new phase of my life, one that has crept up on me like old age.

Gardening.

Gardening is great! Why did I not know this before? Why have I never shown any interest in other people’s hydrangeas or fuchsias previously?? Because they weren’t MINE, that’s why!!

I now proudly struggle to care for living things (apart from the Frase of course, but he’s v. low maintenance) that need my help to stay alive. They depend on me to water them and choose the right pots and spots, and if they don’t die, I’ll feel so grateful and rewarded.

Here is a brilliant Christmas pressie I got from my sister:


I plan to put a whole lot of herbs in it tomorrow. Went to Ceres
this morning with the Frase, my sis, Heidi and Ian to pick out some plants that will survive anything and we got some good bargains.

Ceres is a very cool place, we got some incredible organic veggies from the market, checked out the chooks and lambs, then went to the café to eat fresh eggs and probably that lambs little brother. Yum yum. We’ve taken to not leaving the house without our green shopping bags and granny shopping trolley. Dee you’d be proud!

In case you are wondering, life has slowed down a bit since London (I know I know, I’ve started using granny trolleys and gardening!) but its still pretty good! Pics of our new house will come soon!

Carlston Holler

This is the new exhibit that we did on Saturday at the Turbine Hall at the Tate Modern.

Weeeeee.

It was extremely scary! They give you elbow pads and a calico matt to slide on. It was pretty nerve wracking after hearing the frase's reaction on the way down, but i think its so traumatic that your brain just blocks it out and all you remember is the adrenalin and the rush! I made silly screeching noises that were a bit embarrassing but everyone else did too. Have video footage of shooting out the end and rolling around giggling at the end!

'For Carsten Höller, the experience of sliding is best summed up in a phrase by the French writer Roger Caillois as a ‘voluptuous panic upon an otherwise lucid mind’. The slides are impressive sculptures in their own right, and you don’t have to hurtle down them to appreciate this artwork. What interests Höller, however, is both the visual spectacle of watching people sliding and the ‘inner spectacle’ experienced by the sliders themselves, the state of simultaneous delight and anxiety that you enter as you descend.'

Again, again!!!!!

Munich!!

Guten Abend!

I am writing to you in stilted fashion on a german kezboard where all the letters are in the wrong place, so forgive me, but get used to it.

Munich!!!

Its a strange place, but i never want to leave!

Some of the amaying sights so far-
A dog, on a motorcycle, wearing motorcycle goggles. Yes, goggles! Das ist lustig!

Leiderhosen, everywhere. EVERYWHERE! Dirndl for the ladies, leather trousers- or shorts, for the men. Wunderbar. scott and i feel completely out of place without any embroidery.

Kneeslapping and folk dancing. Kiss me, im a schuhplattler! its strangly thrilling to watch men in leather clap thier hands in a 'virile and impressing manner'.

Cat's 'whores, hags and hangmen' tour around munich.

The beer. The beer. And more beer!!! we went to Oktoberfest on sunday, where they had an amazing parade. the germans definitly know how to parade... amazing brass bands and a very impressive show of beards, moustaches, beer barrels and everything else bavarian!

drank two steins (a litre each stein) and ate half a chicken and some salted radishes. got a gingerbread from scotty that said 'ich leiber dich' in icing. ah! also much dancing and merriment to the oompah bands on the bandstand in the middle of our tent.


sausage for breakfast, lunch and dinner. bavarian white sausage and beer for breakfast! obatza and sausage for lunch! sauerkraut and sausage for tea. no more sausages pls. The proper bavarian way to eat white sausage is to dip it in sweet mustard then suck the meat out through a hole in the end. Never pick it up and eat with a fork. Never eat them after midday. and never eat the skin! usually accompanied with a pretzel. yum!

a willy wonka style tour of the pauliner beer brewery. we were carefull not to drink or touch anzthing we shouldnt.... a dutch man wasnt. we were just waiting for the oompah loompahs to take him away. sadly they didnt, but maybe, maybe.....soon....

Munich has a population of just over 1 million, but during Oktoberfest that almost doubles with an influx of Australians! They are everywhere in packs making dickheads of themselves! Wearing the uniform of boardshorts, thongs and sunglassess on their heads. Getting messy drunk, and acting up on the U-Bahn.

Beautiful dogs! And big!

Cat, our host! she is a real life laura croft, speaks 5 languages fluently (german, english, swedish, mandarin, french, and little bits of classical latin and greek goddammit), she is an archiologist, and actually just a bit foxy. she rocks munich, she makes us tea in the morning, and is the best dj on the scene!!!

Dancing with my Shag hero (he taught me everything i know) Marcus. (of marcus and babel, 'swing World Champions.') er, not sure what year that was, but you can still see they are the best in germany. i couldnt take my eyes off them on the dance floor! and i danced with marcus which was just brilliant, i felt like the best dancer in the world! thats what a lead should make you feel. thanks marcus! i got my MOJO BACK!!!!!

pics still to come for all this.... my camera got nicked a while back and we are waiting on the film to get developed!

Isle of Wight

3 facts that i bet you didnt know about our holiday destination this weekend:

1. A new species of cat-like dinosaur, yet to be named, was discovered on the Isle of Wight in 1988. The 12ft long creature was equipped with murderous claws, razor sharp teeth and unusually long hind legs on which it ran like the wind.
2. Sir Robert Holmes, a swashbuckling pirate and friend of Charles II, lived in the building which is now the George Hotel, Yarmouth. It was Holmes who introduced the Guinea into the British currency, when he brought back gold from New Guinea. Although he became Governor of the Isle of Wight, his piratical inclinations were still evident by the way he was determined to rid home waters of foreign ships, apparently regardless of the legitimacy or otherwise of their business. He waylaid a ship en route to France and discovered a statue, minus its head, which was destined for the court of King Louis XIV, where the sculptor was to complete the head from life. Commandeering the stature and sculptor, Holmes made him complete the head to his own likeness. The statue can be seen today in St. James Church, Yarmouth.
3. Famous Victorian Samuel London, said then to be the biggest man in the world, died in 1844 and his tomb can be seen in the graveyard of the Church of the Holy Cross, Binstead.

I'm also (in an anoraky and embarrassing way) looking forward to spotting some Red Squirrels, which have been ousted form many mainland habitats by the larger more aggressive grey squirrel.

Am taking a book, my bikini, and all my camera lenses!

Guffaw.

The REAL tube map

Its hot in London at the moment. Scorching in fact! Yesterday the temperature was the hottest July day in the south of England since records began.

The met office is ranking it under the extreme weather page. whooa.

This country isn't set up to deal with these temperatures, especially not the tube system.

its sooooo hot.

big brother

Pete and Nikki, bless.

maddened, afflicted and sectioned members of society deserve our affection even more than everyone else; reason: when you are totally drunk they MAKE SENSE. ive now watched a silent sleeping room full of housemates for an hour, and pete has just made a crazy noise in his sleep. scared the bejeesus out of me. its not good, but its entertaining.

and nikki! im so sad she has been voted out. she has taken mental to a new level, its like if paris hiltons mini dog could talk.....

met the girl who was catering for cheryl tweedy and ashly coles wedding tonite. when i told her i am a WAG fan, she offered me work! for you, my dear friends and readers, if only i had known earlier, i would have accepted this as an undercover assignment. will see what i can do in the future... Rosie refuses to serve royalty, so may be able to scab some shifts from her. i have silver service experience (in spilling plum compote over the premier of tasmania~) so may be perfectly placed to spill some beans on Will, Harry or etc.

ooh, someone just coughed.